Changing things up

      Changing it up is the name of the game this round! Yes, I am still running! Yes, I am still going to the gym but, things are a bit different! I am now doing a cardio session with my trainer (which I figured hell I'm a marathon runner...this will be easy! Ha I was wrong!) that is the toughest 30 minute session ever!! I am also doing a boot camp class with some of my friends! Talk about the hardest hour of my life :) I felt like I was on the Biggest Loser Ranch! I would not and could not do that class if it were not for my amazing friends! The laughter makes the sweat worth it! As we were running a few laps around the track tonight a friend reminded me that being comfortable and jogging is not going to change things! I've got to be ready to push myself to new heights and do it a bit different this round! Yes last year I do great and I kept off the weight I wanted to but I'm ready to finish this up and get to my final goal!!
    I would love to say that this is easy and that I am 100% confident in myself that I can and will finish this. I am about 70% most of the time that I can do this! It is a moment by moment journey for me. Sometimes I think "wow, I really have changed and I can do this!" Other times when I let the food win or I have a crappy workout I think "what's the point." This is a life changer for me and I am not the same person I was 4 years ago! Today on my way home I heard this song: I thought heck...worst case I will just keep running :) Giving up is not an option- yes it floats through my head way more than I actually want to admit, but I am going somewhere and have already ended up somewhere different!
Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavementsEven if it leads nowhere?Or would it be a waste even if I knew my placeShould I leave it there?Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavementsEven if it leads nowhere? 
    Guess what this weekend is ?!?! Super Bowl Sunday...WOOOOHOOO....I HATE FOOTBALL :-) So, for me it means food, friends, food, fun, food, oh and did I mention food?! You see, I like chips, dips, pizza, wings, and absolutely anything you need a toothpick to eat!! These are the times where I feel very out of control with my eating. I am a grazer and I can eat and eat and eat and eat without even realizing it! The more I talk the more I eat, the longer I am in the situation the more I eat! Part of me wants to stay at home with my sugar free Jello and 94% fat free popcorn. BUT I WON'T. I will win this freaking food battle somehow.....even if it means using my very cute pink polka dotted duct tape!!

      I have consistently logged my food for the past 23 days and done really well calorie wise. I've allowed myself to go over my calories by no more than 400 one day a week! The past two weeks I have done my cheat meal with a friend that is loosing weight too, so that is fun to get to celebrate a bit each week.

Week 2

Two weeks in and I'm not ready to die or kill anyone so that is a positive start :-) I am really trying to stay within my calories and work my butt off whenever possible! For the first time the other day I saw my reflection in the door at school and thought "who in the heck is that person?!" I actually liked the picture that was looking back at me. I'm not totally happy because I know I have a lot more work to do, but for one of the first times I can remember I was content with that person looking back at me! I don't know what has taken so long but I thought "wow, I look pretty good!" Now, please don't take that as I think I'm the hottest thing around....PLEASE, I have a muffin top to lose and will be the first to tell you I have big thighs. The list is endless of what I think but the fact I noticed is huge, I rarely see the good I always look at what's left instead of what I've done.

This past week a billboard went up from my gym and I was on it. It was so strange to see it up close yesterday! It was huge!! It was really unreal to see a before and current picture up like that. It is definitely a reminder of the progress I have made! I'm not done but I'm on the right path!

Week 1

It has been 7 days on this new 90 day journey. It has been a tough but good week. I thought that my eating would be harder than it has been. I have done more weights this week than in the past and am changing up my cardio. 1700 calories have been very tolerable. I am eating much cleaner and healthier- lots of egg whites, lean protein, and not many carbs. The longer I am on this journey the more I am realizing that I can not and WILL NOT do this on my own. It is taking a great support team. I have friends willing to tell me to put the candy down, make a better choice, run faster, and work out harder. I am so lucky to have these people around me. I know that many go on this journey alone and I am so thankful for those few people who can call me out in love and kindness. I have always been a pretty self conscious person, but I have finally opened my heart and allowed people in. I have a few people who can look at me and say "you're trying to loose that muffin top, right??- so run faster!!" It is that moment when I realize that people do care and people do want to see me succeed. It is the little things this time that I am finding most helpful. Things like- people asking me what I am eating, texting people pictures of tough moments like candy being on the lounge table at work, cleaning out the candy from my desk, and simply being able to tell people it's a rough day. I know that not everyone needs others, or can handle people being very frank and to the point but, for me..this round it is working and what I need!
Thank you FRIENDS!!!

Here are a few pictures that I have shared with others this week! 

Day one- I receive a very cute late Christmas gift filled with my favorite candy! REALLY!!! Talk about temptation! I can proudly say I gave them to my students :)

Lunch

I baked a fun cake with my friend's son, I sure did get a text making sure I was not eating the entire cake :-) I ate about a cupcakes worth with very little icing! Sounds like a small thing but that was a huge success for me!!  

New found favorite oatmeal! Blueberry from Starbucks! 

Candy I said NO to that was on the lounge table! 

This picture is a tad embarrassing, this is the candy that I cleaned out of my desk! 

yummy bread free sandwich! 

Amazing egg white muffins loaded with veggies!  Made them today for the week

Making sugar free Jello- great sweet snack and very low cal! Add 1Tbs of light whip cream and 1 cup of jello less than 50 calories! 

Lets finish this!

It is time that I buckle back down, get more serious, and finish this journey! I know that journeys take time and I am ok with that I am just ready to see more progress! My gym just started the fittest loser again and I joined! My hope is to rock this competition for the second time :) today I stepped on the scale again, it was a tad scary because we found out the scale the gym did have was about 7 pounds off. So I thought I was in the 160's and actually I'm currently 176! Talk about a blow to my ego, but I have to remember I've still lost over 70 pounds but it means I have some more work to do. Today is day one of the 90 days. My goal is to stay under 1700 calories a day (what the gym currently thinks I should be eating- this is subject to change!) to change up my workout routine, and hopefully watch the weight continue to fall off. I will blog along the way and I can not guarantee that everyday will be grand and wonderful. I know I can do this I have people set up to help along the way and tell me to put the Twinkie down :) or not to order the Girl Scout cookies :-) here it goes....time to finish what I started- because I can, because I want this, because I am determined, and because I want to find who I'm suppose to be!!

Day one of 90

Lets start the year with a trail!

What a great start to 2013! My first race is in the bag. I did the Siberian Express a 7.45 mile trail run in Danville Illinois. Holy hills I tell you, I was like WTH?! At one point I was look up the hill thinking there is no way in heck I can get up this, I started making every excuse in the world as to why I couldn't. I pulled myself together and said oh yes I can! It was a beautiful day with beautiful scenery all around, great group of friends, and a fantastic start to a new year! I have officially lost another toenail on this crazy journey :) that's ok who needs em

A new year a new start!

So it's officially 2013 and time to decide what needs to be done this year. I have a really good work out routine and running schedule it's just time to be more strict and push myself farther. When I start to think about my goals I want to make them ones I can meet and ones that can be life long changes. I have been off the wagon for a bit now and I know that this is a journey and it happens so that's to be expected but it's time to finish what I started. I stepped on the scale today and lets just say I was not happy! Yes I know no one to blame but you guessed it.... Me! Starting Monday is my weight loss 90day challenge at the gym, not sure why but I need goals and challenges so I can do this!

Here are my goals

Loose the next 25 pounds

Track my food for the next 90 days and stick to my calories

Be more positive

Be on my cell phone less