A new chapter in my story and when the picture doesn't lie

So here we are, a long time since my last post. So, this journey that I am on is a daily battle within myself to make choices. Choices that I can tell you- I know the answers- I know what to do- I know how to do it. This is not just a battle it truly is a life style.  A life style that has recently fallen to the wayside in most areas. Yes I am still running (well sort of) and working out but when the calories in are more than the calories out you gain weight.  I was in a boot for 4-6 weeks over the summer and that killed my running! In all honestly I had some huge life changes as I do not do well with stress and change- but seriously how long can I use that excuse. I allowed stress to win, crazy to win, and chose to withdraw from the world (this was needed for a time but no longer!). I knew I had gained a few pounds but not the almost 35 that I have now come to accept as of today! Today was another wake up call for me that this is always going to be a struggle for me and I will always have to be conscious of what I am putting into my body. I am not asking for sympathy or anything because I KNOW I CAN AND WILL GET IT OFF. I feel that it is so important to show that this journey is not always flowers, glitter, and rainbows. It is the hardest race I have ever run and one that I will be in for a lifetime!! When your addiction is food it is what you turn to when stressed, happy, celebrating, mourning, hungry, and what not. I have let that win this time because of life- but it has won the battle not the war!!

I am a school teacher and this is the start of the holiday season LORD HELP ME STAY OUT OF THE LOUNGE!!!! I have made it this far in this journey and I am determined to not let food get the best of me!!! I wish I could say that this is only a once in a while struggle but it’s not! It is every meal, every snack, every gathering, everyday! When your crutch is what you need to live it is hard. I wish I was not a foodie I wish I hated sweets. I can see that finding a balance and finding a way to maintain will be hard. I am currently entering crazy mode- I will get to where I want to be ASAP!! I will not let food win this one!! NOT TODAY! NOT TOMORROW! NOT EVER!! Stress, being busy, being lazy- yep those are my excuses- well not anymore!! It is time to put back on my big girl panties and get serious again. This roller coaster journey is coming out of the dark time and rising back to the top. I want to be the best and healthiest I can because I feel better, look better, am a better friend, and am capable of anything! I can't get to Boston in this shape!! 

Here is to a new beginning!! I am writing my story, my way, and with the ending I want!! One of me healthy, happy, and not giving in! 

Here you are all my friends that want to say “no you have not gained weight” I beg to differ with you and the picture does not lie!!

The left is me at my lowest about 155 last September- the right is the most recent at about 190